the penny drops..

well it would seem that my darling mother is trying to sabotage my weight loss efforts!! seriously!!

i thought it was very sweet that not only did she get me a Magic Bullet food processor thingy for christmas but she also showered me in endless gifts of ferrero, lindt, cadburys, as well as those ultra yummy belgin chocolate sheshells, you know the ones, with that devine hazlenut praline centres *droollll* upon giving this much thought i have come to realise she is trying to sabotage my weight loss as she herself has spent the entire year yoyo dieting which has resulted in a 10kg gain! she has been naking her bumpy butt off sinse i announced my return to the weight loss world, bringing gifts of freshly baked shortbread, pastrys, cake, caramel filled, whipped cream covered, custard oozing goodies...

This morning she comes for a coffee and hands me a pamphlet for 'slimmm' weight loss meal replacment products, upon telling her that i didnt want to do the program with her as im doing really well at the moment just watching my intake she got the fucking shits! what the fuck is wrong with this woman?? maybe she is shitty that i havent been eating all the goodies shes been baking, maybe its because all the christmas choccies are all still in their celephane wrappers? fucked if i know...

One thing i do know is i will not under any circumstances be sabotaged by anyone, not even my own mother, to make her feel better about her weight gain situation!

vent over..lol.

Christmas pics of the kiddies

Corey checking out his christmas stash

Brock enjoying a dip in the kids new pool

Dylan and baby Deagan with Deagans pressie

Lil Miss Amber Lee, my christmas angel xxx

Baby Deagan ready to celebrate his first christmas!

bleh

Went to the Drs on monday afternoon, Corey my eldest needs a reassesment for ADHD, seems he's been pulling the wool over our eyes again :( got another letter from his highschool and his behaviour in term 4 was far from acceptable... think im gonna request a medication trial this time as its all getting way to stressful and just to damn hard to keep him under control, plus when its affecting his family,schooling and solial life its just not on, surely theres gotta be an answer that will make life easier for him, were also going to try some counciling to try and teach him some behaviour managment techniques.

Whilst at the Drs he perscribed me Zoloft as i was getting quite down about the situation with Corey, was supposed to take 25mg a day for 2 weeks then up it to 50mg, but as the days progressed i began to feel bad, extremely bad, not sleeping, racing heart, anxiety, severe panic attacks, by god ive never felt like that before in my life and never ever want to feel like it again! it felt like i was loosing my bloody mind! i havent taken the pills for 2 days now and am starting to feel like myself again, thank god!

I see the dr again on Jan 4th so i'll just wait n see what he has to say about it then, im really not keen on trying anything else after my experience with the zoloft though.

2010

so ive been thinking alot about what i want to achieve in 2010, im not talking new years resolutions, more about plans that will be put into action to actually feel like were getting somewhere! both myself and jason want to move towns, we know its not possible at the present moment but we have decided that it is what we will work towards, life is to short to stay somwhere that is dull and that doesnt offer a bright future for your children, lifes to short to simply 'stay' so that your family wont get upset, yes we will miss them, but its not like we'll be moving across the world ffs! 2010 has a good feeling about it, im feeling extremely positive about the new year and cant wait to get started on it!!

quick catch up

well since my last blog entry and then inturn my internal emotional flipout which resulted in me deleting ALL of my blog entries lots has happened, the biggest event being the birth of our 5th child, Deagan Jace on 13th Oct '09, needless to say that once again pregnancy has left me with a surplus 20kg to shead, ohh joy! Life is non stop with 5 children, its all go go go, stop, breath, focus.... NOW GOOOO! lol seriously there's not a lot of free time and the little i have i tend to spend with a cuppa in hand and a laptop in front of me, life is never dull, always draining, but so very fulfilling, i would have it any other way!

long time between drinks...

once again im feeling the need to blog... it wont be interesting or exciting... just the ups and downs of my daily routine with my gorgeous hubby and 5 fantastic kiddies :o)